it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
