is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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