wake up i wanna do it froggy style
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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