Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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