you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Randomize