Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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