how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
