White coat. Heels.
I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Randomize
