Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
I seem to have left my pride at pride
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize