Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
