Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
