Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
