Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
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