He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I just found puke in my bra..
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
