Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Randomize
