Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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