Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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