my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
