and she was petting her beer can
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
