Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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