Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
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