Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Randomize
