i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
