Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize