I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
