she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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