"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
