Banned from zoo.
Again?
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Randomize
