I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize
