No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
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