their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
