dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Life without a bra equals bliss.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize