I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Randomize
