The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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