i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
