I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
