he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
