After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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