dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
