Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
