my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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