The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Your mom asked you why you had bite marks all over your arms and you answered her by yelling "I HAD A SIESTA!"
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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