considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
