on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
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