Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Screwed.edu
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
