therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
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