We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
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