I want to stick my p in your. b.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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