Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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