Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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