I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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